Message by Dr. David Drake
Series: “Inside / Out”
Living Today The Life Of Jesus
A study through The Sermon On The Mount
Matthew 5-7
Five Building Blocks for a Better Marriage
Matthew 5:31-33
Matthew 5:31-33 (NASB)
31 “It was said, ‘WHOEVER SENDS HIS WIFE AWAY, LET HIM GIVE HER A CERTIFICATE OF DIVORCE’;
32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
33 “Again, you have heard that the ancients were told,
Three principles (truths) for people who have experienced divorce:
1. God’s view of marriage is very high.
Matthew 5:31-32
2. Divorce is never God’s way to resolve conflict in marriage.
That is why God never commands divorce
nor does God ever condone divorce,
and God also never condemns the divorcee.
Romans 8:1 (NASB)
1 Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
3. If divorce has occurred in your past,
and you have properly recognized and confessed
that your decision was a sin against God’s Word,
your past is under the blood of Jesus Christ
and you now live in grace today.
2 Corinthians 5:17 (NASB)
17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.
Five Building Blocks for Better Marriages
1. Make a lifelong commitment.
Matthew 19:4-6 (NASB)
4 And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE,
5 and said, ‘FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’?
6 “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”
Upward decision (to God)…Inward decision (with your heart)…Outward decision (with your partner)
2. Live in absolute faithfulness.
Challenge…
Proverbs 6:20-23 (NASB)
20 My son, observe the commandment of your father And do not forsake the teaching of your mother;
21 Bind them continually on your heart; Tie them around your neck.
22 When you walk about, they will guide you; When you sleep, they will watch over you; And when you awake, they will talk to you.
23 For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching is light; And reproofs for discipline are the way of life
Warning…
Proverbs 6:24-26 (NASB)
24 To keep you from the evil woman, From the smooth tongue of the adulteress.
25 Do not desire her beauty in your heart, Nor let her capture you with her eyelids.
26 For on account of a harlot one is reduced to a loaf of bread, And an adulteress hunts for the precious life.
Results…
Proverbs 6:27-29 (NASB)
27 Can a man take fire in his bosom And his clothes not be burned?
28 Or can a man walk on hot coals And his feet not be scorched?
29 So is the one who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; Whoever touches her will not go unpunished.
Proverbs 4:23 (NASB)
23 Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life.
Unfaithfulness to others in your life may be the direct result of unfaithfulness to God in your life.
3. Give unreserved love.
(unreserved: not restricted, qualified, or unlimited)
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NASB)
4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant,
5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,
6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;
7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails;
How do you reveal your love to your spouse?
By the way you live…by what you say…by who you are
4. Establish open communication.
Take time
Allow freedom of speech
Learn to be a listener
Keep working at it
5. Develop spiritual companionship.
Spiritual control…mutual submission…responsible roles
Ephesians 5:15-33 (NASB)
15 Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise,
16 making the most of your time, because the days are evil.
17 So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.
18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit,
19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord;
20 always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father;
21 and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.
22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.
24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.
28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;
29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church,
30 because we are members of His body.
31 FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.
32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.